‘Find that ugly girlfriend,’ other Fiesta advice from San Antonio lawyer
Fiesta is here, San Antonio. That means it’s time to see local residents let loose and dance, sing, and drink like no one’s watching. The craziest time of year has inspired one San Antonio lawyer to remind residents how to act right, or at least enjoy Fiesta without getting into any legal trouble.
Jesse Hernandez is an attorney in San Antonio and has used TikTok to market his law office as @texaschancla. Recently, his videos have gotten a bit more attention as he’s shared Fiesta-specific content on the social media platform. One video even reminds you about the do’s and don’ts of fighting down at Market Square during Fiesta season.
“Just because some vato is looking at your Fiesta sucia doesn’t mean that you can fight him,” Hernandez, wearing a white guayabera with colorful flowers on the stitching, says. “If someone attacks you, you have the right to self-defense. Other than that, I’m gonna say you should probably just walk away and be happy that your sucia is worth looking at.”
Now that is sound legal advice.
Hernandez also touches on how to handle getting arrested during Fiesta and warns against an increase in DWI enforcement during the citywide 10-day party.
“The cops are going to be out looking for drunk drivers,” Hernandez says in another TikTok. “If you’ve had anything to drink, like we always tell you, take an Uber, take a Lyft, find that ugly girlfriend, give her a call back up, but don’t drink and drive.”
Between Hernandez’s various TikToks, San Antonio residents voiced their appreciation for the legal advice and the lawyer’s understanding of the city.
“I don’t have any ugly GFs. Well… let’s talk after Fiesta week,” joked one man.
“he’s such a different type of lawyer I LOVE this!!!” a woman named Iris added.
“This man is San Antonio,” pointed out another user.
“Or call your gordo attorney or gordo ex boyfriend,” clapped back a woman named Esmer Sanchez.
Shots fired! Stay safe, San Antonio.
