MARTIN SAMUEL: Newcastle’s honeymoon will last until the elite feel threatened

For romantics, the prospect of Newcastle back in the highest echelons of English football is an intoxicating one.

No club has the right to reside among the elite but Newcastle have been in the doldrums for too long. It needs owners with the imagination to realise potential and maybe this new consortium will do that.

How long Newcastle will be allowed their dream, though, is another matter. 

Newcastle are on the cusp of being taken over by a consortium with money to spend

Newcastle are on the cusp of being taken over by a consortium with money to spend

Newcastle are on the cusp of being taken over by a consortium with money to spend

Until they become a threat to some large vested interests is the best estimate. Then, watch attitudes change.

The same happened to Manchester City. The Abu Dhabi ownership was welcomed at first: more excitement for the Premier League, more colour, a fresh narrative. Their fans had suffered long enough, too — didn’t they deserve a few reasons to be cheerful? And while City kept making doomed, clumsy grabs for the likes of Kaka, it kept everyone amused.

Then they got into Europe, then they won the Premier League and suddenly it wasn’t so funny anymore.

The financial fair play (FFP) movement pre-dated Manchester City’s takeover, of course. It was brought in to stop Chelsea, but too late. Yet it was fear of City and Paris Saint-Germain that sent FFP into protectionist overdrive. Since then, every aspect of football’s financial regulation has been tailored to stop two clubs. Now make it three.

Newcastle’s honeymoon will last until the moment the elite feel threatened. There were two types of stories doing the rounds at the weekend. One said Newcastle’s new regime intended to abide dutifully by financial fair play rules, the other that there was £200m to spend on transfers and becoming a leading force. Can’t be done. Mutually exclusive.

FFP is there to stop a club like Newcastle benefiting from owner investment. The proposed takeover has no debt, but UEFA don’t care about debt. Manchester United are laden with it, while Manchester City have none. 

And who do UEFA want out of the Champions League? Football’s back-channelling politicians inside the elite clubs have made sure that FFP targets one aspect of club finance. They don’t like owners who put money in.

Taking it out, like the Glazers — that’s fine.

And some will argue FFP won’t be an issue for Newcastle because they have big gates and a fanatical following, but it isn’t as simple as that. Newcastle’s kit deal with Puma is estimated to be worth £6.5million annually — that’s almost £40m down on Tottenham, close to £100m behind Liverpool.

Yasir Al-Rumayyan is the governor of the Saudi PIF, who want to buy Newcastle for £300m

Yasir Al-Rumayyan is the governor of the Saudi PIF, who want to buy Newcastle for £300m

Yasir Al-Rumayyan is the governor of the Saudi PIF, who want to buy Newcastle for £300m

Of course, it is reasoned Mike Ashley did not leverage enough money from the black and white brand and perhaps that is true. What is also true is Newcastle’s profile beyond these shores is comparatively slight.

All the fond memories of Newcastle in the Champions League before Ashley’s arrival centre on one match, really — racing into a 3-0 lead against Barcelona at home, almost 23 years ago.

Newcastle made it into the Champions League in just three seasons and were knocked out in the group stage, the second group stage, and finally the third qualifying round. It is not a pedigree that instantly attracts glory-hunters in foreign markets. 

Newcastle’s only European success was in the Inter-Cities Fairs Cup 51 years ago. UEFA do not even recognise the competition now. Meaning Newcastle remain a big club in a small pool, much as Manchester City were. It took title wins, world-class signings and Pep Guardiola to challenge perceptions outside this country.

For now, Newcastle are Schalke. From Gelsenkirchen, they attract the third-highest attendances in Germany — an average of 61,044 this season — but their profile beyond is limited.

Why? Schalke have never enjoyed success in Europe’s biggest competition and haven’t won the German title since 1958.

Manchester City's Abu Dhabi ownership was welcome before they started winning trophies

Manchester City's Abu Dhabi ownership was welcome before they started winning trophies

Manchester City’s Abu Dhabi ownership was welcome before they started winning trophies

They are a huge club from a coal-mining region with wonderful support, but there is a reason the elite keep a tight stranglehold on Champions League entry. They know it is the key to the castle. And Schalke have been in UEFA’s marquee competition eight times since Newcastle’s last, fleeting participation.

So building the club up to a financial state that can overcome the limitations of FFP will not be easy. There can be some easy investment and public relations wins at first and improvement to technical facilities are not regulated against in the same way.

But City did not take on the elite because they built a state-of-the-art training ground. Players got them there; great players, acquired at enormous expense.

It is suggested that, after the coronavirus crash, owner investment will no longer be considered dirty. All clubs, even the frugal ones, will need funds and this could count in Newcastle’s favour. Don’t bet on it.

Manchester United’s commercial structure places them in a very strong position, and while they have that it is unlikely they will encourage the relaxing of rules that discourage competition.

No doubt they will be welcoming, supportive and utterly charming in the confines of the directors’ box. That is how Manchester City found them, too.

If the newest members of the owners’ club want to know how football really feels about them, however, check the rulebook.

Calamity Capello shows why we need an English boss 

Joe Cole was upset to hear his former England team-mate, goalkeeper David James, afforded the nickname ‘Calamity’ in conversation, by Fabio Capello. 

Reviewing his time as England manager, Capello spoke of replacing Robert Green, after his mistake against the United States. ‘I have always had bad luck with goalkeepers internationally,’ he said. ‘I put in Calamity James…’ 

Cole said Capello was being disrespectful and it showed he was not fully committed to the job. More likely, it is further evidence that Capello did not get the English. Not the language — he had enough to be understood, and it’s not like he was teaching structural engineering — but the personality of the country. 

When the players complained about not being allowed a modest drink after games, Capello responded by steering them to the bar the night before a major match and couldn’t comprehend their horror. 

He just thought the English wanted a beer, not a small degree of responsible freedom. It was probably the same with ‘Calamity’ James. Capello will have seen it as just a bit of fun between friends and team-mates and continues using it today, little realising the nuance, and its insulting nature. 

He didn’t get us; but we didn’t get him, either. That’s another reason why it is best to have an English boss.

Joe Cole (R) felt Fabio Capello (L) was never fully committed to being England manager

Joe Cole (R) felt Fabio Capello (L) was never fully committed to being England manager

Joe Cole (R) felt Fabio Capello (L) was never fully committed to being England manager

Aurier does not learn yet again

Serge Aurier’s career at Tottenham could be approaching the end after he was twice caught breaching coronavirus lockdown regulations. 

His form has improved under Jose Mourinho but he has never been able to command a regular first-team place, despite costing £23million in 2017. 

Recently, he spoke of his love for Paris Saint Germain, saying he would like to finish his career there. And that’s the problem. Aurier didn’t need to wish. 

He was on the books at PSG from 2014, and could have remained there had he been good enough to stay in the team, and not called his team-mate Angel Di Maria ‘a clown’ and his manager, Laurent Blanc, ‘a p***y’. 

Aurier seems unable to comprehend the correlation between events and outcomes, which is how a person gets caught flouting coronavirus rules, twice. 

Serge Aurier (L) flouted social distancing rules again as he trained with Moussa Sissoko

Serge Aurier (L) flouted social distancing rules again as he trained with Moussa Sissoko

Serge Aurier (L) flouted social distancing rules again as he trained with Moussa Sissoko

Tennis’ talk was cheap after all 

So the organisers of the French Open were right. A Grand Slam does matter more. Last month, when the Roland Garros event was postponed and arbitrarily switched to dates across September and October it appeared the French had infuriated the rest of tennis. 

The players were against it, the ITF and governing bodies were in opposition— and the Laver Cup organisers were furious, their position in the schedule ignored. It was an arrogant affront and looked set to backfire. 

This week, the Laver Cup was cancelled and rearranged for 2021. For all the talk, tennis went with the money. Quelle surprise, as they would say in the 16th arrondissement.

Clubs left in the dark with no end in sight 

Liverpool have stopped selling season tickets for next year due to the uncertainty over whether this campaign will finish and when the new one will start. 

With four home matches still to play, Anfield season ticket holders will be due a partial refund if the 2019-20 fixtures are not completed, and it would be smarter to offer discounts with renewals at some future date, than refunds.

Yet at least Liverpool know what division they will be in. Clubs towards the bottom of the Premier League cannot even say for sure if they will have avoided playing 2020-21 in the Championship. This is all part of the uncertainty that is driving an increasing number to support curtailing the season. 

Surely UEFA aren’t REALLY considering one-off games 

UEFA’s latest guidelines for finishing domestic competition have been interpreted as steering the clubs towards play-offs.

Nothing this specific is mentioned in their statement, mind, and it seems a barmy idea anyway. For a start, if football cannot be restarted, why should there be the possibility of playing one-off games?

Surely a showdown for a title, a Champions League place or relegation would be more likely to attract dangerous gatherings outside the venue, than any other fixtures.

And how would the leagues decide what needs settlement?

UEFA cannot consider one-off showdowns for a title, a Champions League place or relegation

UEFA cannot consider one-off showdowns for a title, a Champions League place or relegation

UEFA cannot consider one-off showdowns for a title, a Champions League place or relegation

Are Liverpool so far ahead that they would not need to play, or could they risk losing the title to Manchester City in some artificial final? Equally, who decides the relegation candidates? Southampton are seven points off the bottom three but with nine games remaining. Are they safe?

Every league would adopt its own arbitrary formula. Arsenal are eight points short of the Champions League, and in ninth place, but have included the possibility of qualification in their formula for wage cuts, so clearly don’t consider it impossible.

Play-offs would be too random, particularly with such immense rewards and penalties.

If UEFA insist on a process for qualification in 2020-21, aggregate points present the only reasonable means. And not for relegation; unless football wishes to spend the next five years in court.

Derby asked, Rooney said: ‘on your bike!’

There is an old joke about two friends walking along the road. One spies a Rolls-Royce. ‘If I had two cars like that, do you know what I’d do?’ he says. ‘I’d give one to you.’ 

A little further down they see a magnificent house. ‘If I had two houses, do you know what I’d do?’ the man continues. ‘I’d give one to you.’ His companion thinks about this beneficence for a while. 

‘What if you had two bikes?’ he asks. ‘You b******,’ the man replies. ‘You know I’ve got two bikes.’

And that, in a nutshell, is Wayne Rooney’s relationship with Derby. Writing in his newspaper column earlier this month, Rooney pledged: ‘If Derby County needed me to take a pay cut to save the club I would understand and look to support them in whatever way I could.’ 

Then Derby did just that. They requested 50 per cent deferred to get them through the current crisis. Rooney, as captain and therefore the players’ representative, wants that figure halved. Through the Professional Footballers’ Association there is also the distrustful insistence Derby open their books to prove financial distress.

If the club does not, even the reduced offer will be withdrawn. They’ve probably got two bikes as well, those rotters.

Wayne Rooney is fighting for Derby players in the battle against their wages being deferred

Wayne Rooney is fighting for Derby players in the battle against their wages being deferred

Wayne Rooney is fighting for Derby players in the battle against their wages being deferred

Ferrari and F1 need each other now and always

Like all major sports, Formula One is being forced to consider its economic structure in the light of the coronavirus crisis. 

Teams had agreed to a budget cap of £140million for 2021 but the FIA met F1 team owners last week to discuss further spending limits. Ferrari, however, have threatened to walk away if these are imposed. 

Team principal Mattia Binotto warned they could quit and explore other options for Ferrari’s ‘racing DNA’. The FIA should call his bluff. Ferrari is a fabulous name and the only team to be competing since the first championship in 1950; it has history, prestige and a fanatical, colourful following. 

Yet Formula One has been good for Ferrari, too. It remains the pinnacle in terms of technology, engineering and performance. 

What other motor sport could showcase Ferrari like it? This is a symbiotic relationship. Ferrari and F1 very much need each other. 

Neville’s job must go to a female coach 

Predictably, Phil Neville has reached the end of the line as manager of England’s women. 

He won’t renew his contract which ends next summer, and even taking the squad into the 2021 Tokyo Olympics is now in doubt. 

Casey Stoney of Manchester United has emerged as an early contender for the role, which is a step forward. The coach of England’s women’s team should be female. 

It is the most prestigious job in the game and should be used for the advancement of women coaches. 

Neville’s successor though, male or female, must further improve technical levels if the team is not to go swiftly backwards.

It's right that Casey Stoney of Man United is an early contender to replace Phil Neville

It's right that Casey Stoney of Man United is an early contender to replace Phil Neville

It’s right that Casey Stoney of Man United is an early contender to replace Phil Neville

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